ooc
Tuesday, June 5
And so, I guess that's that. The documents have been signed, the stamps have been stamped, the papers have been processed; with that, I have been officially OOCed.
If you told me at the start of OCS that I'd be getting OOCed for something other than a physical injury, I would never have thought it possible. Which is perhaps why most people were shocked to hear I was taken out of course --- for no more than a mild cough, as part of bronchitis on the road to recovery. Many expect me to be disappointed, yet I am honestly perfectly at peace with the outcome. My only disappointment comes from the knowledge that I will not have the honour and privilege of spending the rest of the term alongside my section of genuinely awesome people.
A week ago, my heart and mind was in a state of turmoil. I was absolutely distraught with the sacrifices in personal life that OCS was forcing me to make (the post dated 30May is a toned down edit of the original highly cynical piece I wrote in camp), and I was tempted to pull a chaokeng to get myself out of OCS. However, I was filled with this nagging feeling that I had unfinished business in OCS, and to quite would be to let God down. Over the weekend from Friday to Sunday, the Holy Spirit continually revealed His purpose in OCS for me, through leading me to personal realisations, as well as through words of knowledge from the family. I was invigorated with purpose, and knew for certain my place in OCS. As such, going in to see the MO this morning, I'd decided to let God take full control of the outcome --- no pleading to stay on, and no twisting of facts to make my condition sound worse. The verdict came, and so, that was that.
Thus, it is the build up of these circumstances that causes me to believe this is God's will, and is clearly in His perfect timing. It was as if, after my epiphanies about my purpose had come, He declared, "Great! You've learnt what I wanted you to, and now we can go elsewhere." As such, I feel it is only right that I keep a record of these learning points, just as I did after BMT. So without further ado...
- Coming to OCS taught me to believe I could be greater. Prior to OCS, I never believed I could achieve pinnacles of success. Sure, I believed that I could achieve some pretty great stuff, but I never believed I could be outstanding. As such, I often only contended for what was comfortably lower, unknowingly placing an invisible limit and barrier on what I could achieve.
However, taking the leap of faith into OCS acted like a catalyst which caused similar breakthroughs in other areas, breaking me free from self-doubt. Moreover, it was a first step in fostering a willingness to step up to higher challenges and reaching for greater heights. With this, I dare to believe.
- OCS also taught me the need for hard work and sacrifice, and how to juggle priorities amidst these sacrifices. What I found was that truly as Matthew 6:33 says, "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
Whenever I tried to make time to see different groups of friends out of my own strength, I found myself tired out and stretched thin. In contrast, when I spent my time resting in God and enjoying His company, meetings with friends and quality time with the family fell easily into place, without me making any arrangements. Truly, seek first His kingdom! After all, He knows the priorities of our heart, and will cause things to align nicely for us (:
- Finally, I was once again assured of my interaction with new groups of people. Somehow or another, I managed to establish a reputation as a nice guy, and well, it's always nice to know you've such a reputation. I honestly don't know what I do to make people think that, but hey, at least it means I'm doing something right (:
And it's indeed a joy and comfort to hear people saying today that they'll miss me. I don't think of myself as a particularly memorable or unique character, so to have people saying that after these few weeks, it really meant something to me. Sigh, I will really, really miss my section mates.
- And this has nothing to do with anything, but I shall include it as it made me laugh tonight.
Qin Hui commented, "Clement looks like the kind that cannot do anything [physically], but he's actually fit like ****!" Hahaha I've no idea how that adjective even works, but it was hilarious to hear all the same. The many times I've heard things along these lines, I can only smile and laugh. Indeed I am blessed.
In all, while I may not have completed the course, I believe I saw God's purpose for me in OCS to its completion. And so, 8 weeks after POP, yet another chapter in my army journey comes to a close, albeit many weeks earlier than expected.
Here begins Chapter 3, and I look forward once again to more heavenly lessons from the Author of Life. My heart eagerly awaits.
but oh, the bittersweet feeling of leaving
AMEN;
9:04 pm
